January: A Month in Rearview

You might have gathered from my recent posts that my 2015 didn't get off to the best of starts. It began unexpectedly, finding myself consigned to a hospital ward, eating New Year's dinner around a table of  strangers and staff. Everything was odd and I walked through much of the month feeling a bit detached.

The first 16 days of the month were spent on the ward. Hospital can be an incredibly frustrating place to be and, on this occasion, I certainly found that to be true. But it was also a place where stories were exchanged over cups of tea, where hilarity ensued over Friday night colouring-in "parties", and where empathy was found perched on the end of strangers' beds. In all these things there were tiny glimmers of hope.

On the 16th they finally let me discharge myself and I threw some things in a bag and drove home to my parents' house. They watched over me for a few days and then, as they headed off on holiday, I watched over the menagerie and the house. It was a week spent walking dogs, cuddling cats, watching movies, cooking good food and just allowing myself the time and space to relax. 

From there it was back to the city and back to the flat with the greatest intention of diving back into work. Things didn't quite go to plan - as is often the way of 'things' - and it took me one short shift to realise I wasn't ready just yet. The last week of January was a bit of an anxious one as I went backwards and forwards to hospital and GPs and work, endlessly battling phone phobia as I tried to figure out what to do and what I'm entitled to. There isn't a solid plan in place just yet, but I ended the month feeling a little more confident that we might be able to find a way through.

We'll wait and see, I guess.

January was a tough old month, but it ended on a better note than it began and I can only hope the same is true for the year. Here's to February.. Let's see what it has to offer.