IN REARVIEW // February 2018


February passed me by like an undulating road - full of little ups and downs, but no particular highs or lows. It was a fairly average month with little to make me sit up and take notice, but gladly so: sometimes those ordinary months are exactly what we need. 

I was tired walking into the month - January having left me hopeful and determined but running low on energy. I needed a month of ordinary routine to recharge and remember how to breathe.

The days passed me by quickly but without the blur of high speed, filled up with volunteering and Spanish classes; therapy and Psychology groups; pub quizzes with family and many a coffee with friends. Something about this month made me appreciate the diversity of my friendships - I don't have a huge number of them, but the ones I do were forged across a broad spectrum of time and place and I am deeply grateful for the roles they play and the different kind of intimacy I share with each. 

Therapy became hard work this month as we moved beyond the surface of just getting to know one another, beginning to dig away at the ground beneath. Psychology group too had its moments, covering difficult topics left untouched in previous weeks. After 20 sessions, the programme finished at the end of the month and, while I was ready and counting down to its finale, goodbyes like that are always a little sad and strange. I said another goodbye this month too - one far more celebratory - when I shook off the legal weight of my CTO! In a significant turn around from January's disappointment, I received a phone call from my care team with the surprising news that they'd had a rethink and decided to let it lapse! I cried with delight at reaching another little landmark on my journey. 

Much of this month felt like a landmark in its own way - that I've reached a point where an entire month can pass by in a mediocre way, without the deadening lows and uphill battles, is a funny sort of victory that I will gladly take!

That said, here's to March - an upcoming month of highs (hopefully!) or adventures at the very least.

Feb 2018 - Laura Whispering - Cafe Society Aberdeen
Feb 2018 - Laura Whispering - Pancake Day
Feb 2018 - Laura Whispering - Cult of Coffee Aberdeen